Winter Blues

Its cold in Västerås, and the darkness is getting better since the last time i talked about the Sunday blues. Well, we've got snow and the days are brighter but then i still got the winter blues in me. Winter begins with the mood swings, the hibernationation effect and the lack of everything. I try really hard to be upbeat and positive but i slowly fall into the abyss...

Well Christmas is gone and the seasonal fever seems to be fading away, I havent been able to do anything since the semester break... well i worked last week.. which really felt good.. I mean meeting my old clients not working on christmas eve and the d-day.. that really sucked... I missed my people at work... everytime i seem to learn something new from them..

It wasnt bad at all to get back.... my job humbles me and helps me appreciate the good things i have in life... Now am home and i wish i was in some warm country maybe somewhere in El Nido palawan or so... am stuck here in the winter... havent studied at all... been on the net doing just anything but nothing... Well, my friend J' just called and am heading down to them for lunch atleast i got something going on... New years is here and i cant help but be glad that 2009 is gone... and am definately starting a new day today cant wait to 2010.. sounds just too far to wait.

To many, darkness either of day or the mind is frightening. We are enculturated to seek light, to shed light, to have a bright idea. An abyss, an unknown dark place of great depth, would seem a frightening prospect. But what if you did look there, in the place of lacking, what would you see or feel? What would it be like to sit with it, even for a few minutes a day, to wait for an image – anything that you could hold in your mind or write on paper? What would you find there? The name of a friend you would like to contact? An unresolved question? Or the stifling presence of the understanding that there are more desirable paths that you would like to take in life?

Well, my winter blues wont bring me down, am gonna get out there and just meet some incredible people... Have a good time and come back to my sound home.... i just love it here.. I hope the season is getting on well for everyone.. for those with more light than us in the north pole, enjoy it... it feels like i have to run to the apotek and get me some vitamin D's i surely need them.
A Prosperous new year 2010 to everyone and Adio^s 2009 and all the troubles it came with.

Wowowee!!!!

Its a new day again:) Cant get some sleep... been up watching Paradise Hotel, wow people can be "örmar" as they say in swedish for snakes. Do anyone ever wonder if a friend is a true friend or just one of those people we call friends with benefits? Well, Looking at PH i doubt you can trust anyone in the western world... everyone seem to be so fake... People like you for the outer you rather than who you trully are... inside:) Am pretty sure most of us have been in those situations when we wonder how much our friends value us... One thing for sure is that we love or rather like people on different levels... and never will we ever find a friend that loves us the same way we do to them and vice versa...

Well, its time to make me some te' before i head to slumberland... read afew lines for my next exam before i doze off my books... Its weird that when am supposed to be up, am so dead asleep.. now its 1.00am and it feels like i just woke up.... i still got the energy and can still go on another 3 hours.... Well i will live you with one word magandang gabi! Tagalog for Good night mi gente

Lucia Day

Swedish Lucia Tradition
The Swedish Lucia celebration is an annual festival of medieval origin, observed on the 13th of December. On this day, the darkness is brightened by Saint Lucia, a creature of goodness and light who opens the door to the Christmas season.

Named after a Sicilian saint, the Swedish Lucia does not have much in common with her namesake. She is celebrated in a variety of ways, but the most common is the Lucia procession consisting of a group of young girls and boys singing traditional Lucia songs.

On her head, the girl or woman playing the part of Lucia wears a wreath of lingonberry sprigs with holders for real candles (battery-powered ones are sometimes a safer option) to give the effect of a halo. She also has a white, full-length gown with a red ribbon around her waist. Her female attendants (tärnor) wear similar gowns and the "star boys" (stjärngossar) wear white pointed hats decorated with stars. Lucia processions are held in various places, ranging from kindergartens and schools to churches and the Swedish Parliament.

Lucia can be perceived as a symbol of the good forces in life and a symbol of light in the dark winter. She usually appears early in the morning, bringing coffee and saffron-flavored buns (lussekatter) shaped like curled-up cats and with raisin eyes. You eat them with glögg or coffee traditionally eaten around Christmas time in Sweden.

Being the third sunday of the advent, Lucia dagen will be celebrated today....... On Friday, we went to Kåren (the student union pub) to celebrate the last day of the semester... well, me and my friends didnt dress up in the gowns but those who s´did surely looked good in them. Happy Lucia day:)

Sunday Blues

Gone are the days i used to look forward to Sundays masses at the Holy family Bassilica. Today is the 3rd advent and i havent been to church, well some of you might wonder why? or even feel that they belong in my category. Well, the windy and snowy day in V-town isnt that glamorous, I find it so hard to wake up in the morning when its still dark at 8 am and prepare for the daily errands, so today like any other sunday am indoors. My friends M and V, promised to come over for a sunday brunch but them just like me couldnt get out of bed.

Now am lying here in my room wondering how long this would continue, i miss the sunny sundays in the summer and most especially in Nairobi going out for lunch and just being lazy in the sun after the sunday masses. Well, its 15.48 now still sipping my cup of coffee, and listening to Lang Lang's performance. It feels good, i must admit.. Being home and just do nothing.... well its dark already at 15,57.... have a nice sunday people.... here are afew pics from my rare balcony view... its cold but the sky is beautiful.... Adios mi Hantes

Jason Derulo - Whatcha Say - Official Video

The Art of Finding Oneself

Today am glad to write about something I have always considered as the art of finding oneself, in most intriguing situations that I have come across I learned that we are the product of our parents and have many of their traits; both the good ones and the bad ones. This has been fine with me, but for others this is a great issue. To understand that what you perceive as unreasonable behavior displayed by someone you are close to (or anyone for that matter) is a part of you that you are not willing to accept, is mind-blowing. Yet we are all good and bad and we need to accept every part of ourselves including our shadow self (perceived bad part).

I still catch myself judging someone for an act that I don’t believe is reasonable and then try and work out when I do something similar on occasions. The bottom line is that our lives are created through our life experiences and not one person has had the same life as us however similar our upbringings might have been. We perceive things very differently from one another, so our judgements and assumptions of anyone else can never be correct. Most of us don’t know how we ourselves tick let alone trying to work out on how someone else ticks.

I have learned that I need to accept everything about myself and if I discovered a part of my behavior that I didn’t particularly like then I had the ability to change it. Now changing a pattern of behavior may not be easy, but it is definitely doable and it doesn’t have to be a difficult process. We hang on to our tough upbringing, bad relationships, etc as if our life depends on it. It may be what we have been taught, but it isn’t necessary. When we become aware of how we react and behave, we move into constant learning of ourselves and our surroundings and realize that both positive and negative experiences are required to make us into the best we can be. Obviously some life experiences are tougher to get through than others, but the relief once it has been let go is a feeling like no other. When that is dealt with ,our perception changes and we now have the space within to create a new and much happier life story.

This whole year I learned of integrity; when what you say, do, think and feel is in line with your conscience. When we act in a way that we believe someone else wants us to, we are no longer being true to our core being and therefore are not living in integrity. I asked a male friend of mine recently why some men say they will call and then do not do it. His answer was that they believe it makes us happy to hear this! I explained that the hurt we feel when no call arrives is twofold as an expectation has been set and not met and we are also disappointed not to have talked. In their mind they may have been meaning to follow through and got sidetracked, and all of us are guilty of this at various times, so therein also lays personal responsibility. We are all responsible for our actions and words, so let’s make them mean something and learn to only say we will do something if we are sure we can follow it through.